


What could have been

by CaptivatingLadySpinel



Series: My Inner Circle Heart [3]
Category: Winner (Band), YG Entertainment | YG Family
Genre: F/M, Falling In Love, Not being corresponded, Sex-partners
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-03 19:48:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20458490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptivatingLadySpinel/pseuds/CaptivatingLadySpinel
Summary: The eldest, Kim Jinwoo, spills the taboo words in his relationship.





	What could have been

**Author's Note:**

> This is my last work on WINNER and obviously my last rendition to the debut month special I did after celebrating my birthday.
> 
> I had noticed I always make them suffer a bit though I think it's good as it is better to leave all the bad things in fiction than for it to happen in real life. Also, you may have noticed the addition of Nam Taehyun, a former member. I wrote these fics before he left the group, that's why he is there. No matter the reason he left, I still hope he is well and is living his life in a fulfilling way.
> 
> This is the last fic I post about the Korean culture in a while as I am busy with other fics. However, I hope you enjoy them and I thank you for reading them!

* * *

The bodies intertwined, the sweat-like-pearls adorned their skin, their respiration accelerated and soft sounds came out from their mouths. The pumping of their hips and the lewd noises from their groins together with the creaking of the bed filled the hot room. Random callings of their names and the savage connection of their lips when needed. The never ending gazes and the expressions full of pleasure. The nails clawing on the skin and the sucking or biting on the same. The shivering of the bodies signaling them that they were at their limit. One, two, three last thrusts and her voice let everything out continued by his grunts as he filled her up. 

Now, both tired just hug ged each other not caring about the sweat or other fluids  in their bodies  to enjoy the sensation of feeling each other, feel ing their skin touching, hear ing their heart pumping blood at a fast pace and how they str ove to calm their breathing. One last kiss that last ed for many minutes in which they savor ed their lips,  their  tongues and mouths as if they would die if they d id n't do it. The gentle caress after the kiss and the intense staring. They smile d at each other and end ed their session full of passion and lust. He la id down next to her and she cuddle d,  her arm on his chest while he  hugged her with one arm. 

After some time of staying like that, she gets up and sits on the edge of the bed to take out a cigarette  from the drawers of the night table. 

"Don't leave me." He  whispered while preventing her from getting up by grabbing her arm. 

"I don't want to bother you with the smoke." She gestur ed with the cigarette but he d id n't let her go. 

"It's ok, just do it here. I don't want you to leave." He begs. She smile d and after caressing his cheek, she light ed her cigarette,  gave it a drag just to let the smoke out after some seconds.  S he  was interrupted  in her vice  by a pair of lips that kiss ed her back, her neck and her jaw. "Can't help it. You make me get hard when I see you smoking like that." He confesse d a bit embarrassed. She smirk ed and then stub bed out the cigarette on the ashtray. 

"This is the fourth time now. You really are insatiable, Jinwoo." She pushe d him on the bed to capture his lips in a kiss tasting like smoke. 

"So are you, Mio." He ma de their bodies roll to end up on her and once again he suck ed on her nipples making her moan. The ritual of giving and getting pleasure beg an once more. As she said, the fourth time now and they will finish until the sun rises on the horizon as sleeping is something they deprive themselves regularly. 

One, a famous singer from the group WINNER, the eldest, and known for being innocent and cute is now making a woman lose her mind with his fierce thrusts that hit on her spot every single time. The other, a producer that stresses her life out with her job and whenever she gets to her limit she craves for sex. Both met during the shooting of a MV and the soothing of her needs plus his curiosity led them to become sex-partners. 

To her, a 28-year-old woman, it  was more than clear that she  was just using him to release herself and that at first  she  doubted he could give her what she wanted but  she was  glad she was wrong because he g ave her all she need ed and more. 

To him, what began like a game of wanting to know his capacity,  his endurance , ended up in a trap for his own heart. Their constant meetings that not only involve d sex but casual talks about each other made him fall for her. And now, he  was just depending on those meetings to be with her, to feel her, to let her know that it is not only her body that he wants. 

He accepts that having sex with her is awesome, beyond what he can expect and what he can experiment too as they have done it in probably every corner of her house, the bedroom, the bathroom, the kitchen, the living room, even the balcony under the starry night. It  was too bad they cannot do it in public since what they are doing is a complete secret. 

  


…

  


"Hyung, coming to Japan makes you really happy. I've never seen you more eager to come." Says Minho while boarding the plane to Japan. It's been two months since they last went there and he misse s her. He missed having her under his body, kissing her, telling her he loves her at least in his mind. Simply having her just for himself. It's become a total obsession. 

"Who knows, he might have gotten himself a girl." Seungyoon joke d but the words just ma d e Jinwoo flinch since they are true. Not precisely a girl, but a woman with whom meeting her means having sex until dawn. 

As soon as they reach ed their hotel, he immediately sends her a message telling her he's in the country and that he wants to see her. Generally, it  would be her that calls for him but two months for him ha d been a complete torture and he doesn't have the total freedom of calling her due to their job and supervis ion of his leader. His activities take all the time of the day and part of the night but that doesn't dishearten him as much as not receiving a message or a call from her. Onodera Mio has become the first thing he thinks about as soon as he wakes up and the last when he goes to sleep. 

When he receive d a message from her it  was almost midnight and he has to wake up early next day to rehearse for a concert they are doing, but he doesn't care. He grab bed his jacket, put on his shoes and silently g ot out of the room car eful not to wake up Minho who's sound asleep, but just when he's out, his heart skip ped a beat when he s aw someone standing in the hallway. Taehyun. He let out a sigh because he thought it was their manager or someone from the staff. 

"Out again, hyung?" Taehyun inquire d but he just does it to confirm as he's aware where he goes when he sneakily escapes at night. 

"Mm." It's all Jinwoo sa id with a nod. He doesn't worry that it is Taehyun because he knows that he won't tell anybody. Though they have talked about it and Taehyun doesn't really approve what his hyung is doing, he cannot do anything but cover for him. 

"Don't come back late. We have to rehearse."  Th e  youngest  warn ed him and enter ed the room he shares with the two Seungs. 

Like an arrow, he rapidly ran out of the hotel and taking care there were no paparazzi or any other person around, he hailed a taxi and gave the driver an address. The address of the apartment building where she lives. He rings the doorbell once and waits a bit impatient for her to open. As soon as the door opens, his eyes brighten and without losing a second he enters the place. His thumping heart revealed his anxiety and how much he craved for touching her. But even when he doesn't do it, he knows it won't be long before he has her in his arms. 

Just a second after the door close d he c ould feel her lips on his, devouring his mouth. He d id n't fall behind and quickly grab bed her waist pulling her closer to him. And once again the cycle begins. Since it's been a long time he hasn't seen her, he c ouldn’ t wait to take her to the bedroom and just quickly t ook her to the living and both la id on the couch. 

He blatantly open ed her legs and spread ed them while thrusting her just to enjoy seeing all her expressions. See how she enjoys having him inside her and how she asks for more. After her first orgasm, he doesn't let her rest and lifts her to make her ride him. He catches one of her nipples in his mouth and begins to bite making her scream. This time due to the extreme and constant contractions, he spurt ed everything inside her and throws his head back. 

They hug ged each other while resting a bit and then continue d until they end ed up on the bed, him giving her for behind, her moans becoming screams of pleasure and phrases like 'Give me harder', 'Feels so good', 'There, harder there'. But no matter how much he like s her screaming for more, at the end he always turns her around to make her face him, look at him and kiss him until he marks her as his and she scratches his back letting him know how fr ea king good he's while doing sex. 

But he c ouldn’ t take it anymore, he want ed to say it. Not just have sex but make love with her, so he ha d to say it. He lean ed just on time before he reache d his last orgasm and whisper ed in her ear. 

"I love you." 

The taboo words that he kn ew he never ha d to pronounce, he delicately and lovingly sa id them in her ear while in exchange he just g ot a moan and her pulling his hair feeling how she tremble d under him while reaching the sky with that orgasm. They d id n't move while they wait ed to let the sensation wear off but this time he doesn't get off her, he continue d hugging her while gently kissing her ear and neck and once again he whisper ed the words. 

"I love you." 

His eyes look ed for hers and they stare d at each other, him looking for hope, hope for her feeling the same as him, that his pure love wo uld n't go to waste. She just look ed at him asking herself why and how things ended up like that. She hug ged him and caresse d his hair  yet d id n't say anything, just  repeating that  movement until he f ell asleep. 

  


…

  


Two weeks later, after the concert tour they d id in some regions of Japan, they  went back to Tokyo to rest before going to China with more concerts.  The l ast time Jinwoo and Mio met, he didn't get an answer to his feelings and just left the place running after sleeping for an hour going back to the hotel unnoticed. He ha d n't received any message from her, not even a reply for the many he ha d sent. He fe lt as if he has been rejected but still ha d hope for  the case to  be otherwise. The feelings he has for her are even bigger than he ever thought, that whenever his phone rings, he jumps to immediately grab it. 

A wide smile form ed on his face as the message he got  was from Mio. It  was still noon when he receive d it but he doesn't care and races out the hotel saying he's going to buy stuff when he's rushing to her apartment. He g ot scared  seeing the door was  open and g ot even more terrified when he finds the whole apartment empty. He r an around the place looking for her but n ot even  her stuff c ould be found, much less her. 

He drop ped himself on the couch and bit his lip not believing what's going on. He open ed his eyes and finds an envelope on the table with her letter on it and words saying 'To Jinwoo'. He hurriedly opened it and just finds an USB key inside. He d id n't think of anything else and  went back to the hotel. 

All the other members look ed how he hurrie d inside the room they  were in, desperately looking for a laptop. He ignore d their questions as to why he's come back so early and why he didn't buy anything and just introduces the USB key to find out what it has. Out of curiosity to see the eldest being so frantic and not listening to them, they approach ed and g o t around the computer to discover what he's watching. In the screen a video plays. Mio's face appear ed in it. 

"Hello Jinwoo." She sa id smiling. The other members  were stunned to know it  was a woman and a beautiful one no less. "You should know by now that the apartment is empty and that means we won't meet anymore. When we decided to be sex-partners, it was just to be that, just to have sex.  W e decided not to have feelings for each other. You broke the rule, Jinwoo." 

By now, all the members, except for Taehyun, were astonished by her words and to know what their eldest member had been doing. 

"I'm going to tell you that you are not the first with whom I do this and I don't think you will be the last. You are known to be innocent and cute that I was impressed by your skills," she chuckle d . The other members don't know how to look at Jinwoo anymore. "But you still keep being the innocent Jinwoo everybody knows and falling in love with me proves it. You should know that I'm a broken person, I don't think highly of love and hope I will never experience it, that's why I just look for men to have sex with, you were one of them. I guess my mistake was to take advantage of that innocent side of you. Here, even sleeping-you look s innocent." 

She move d the camera and show ed Jinwoo sleeping with just half his body covered by the blanket obviously naked under it. 

"Oh my, you began to snore again," she giggle d . "I had fun Jinwoo, with this I can say goodbye to you. Don't blame yourself, just blame me for not loving you back. Also, don't waste your pure feelings on me, I don't deserve them. I hope you  can  find your precious one, the one who can give you what I can't. With that said. Goodbye Jinwoo, take care." 

The video end ed with that and a silent pause  ensued . Jinwoo  was silently holding the computer but he  was also silently crying, just letting his tears fall nonstop. Of course he will blame himself. He will blame himself for falling in love when he knew it was forbidden to do so. But he still dream ed of it, dream ed of a love. Dream ed of what could have been if she had just said 'I love you too'. 


End file.
